After a secret tea time meeting with an insider at the Department of History I have discovered that the current Dept Chair has severe bipolar disorder and regularly calls in sick because she thinks elephants are roaming the city. Also, several of the faculty are fucking each other, and a couple of the faculty are fucking students. One prof has been denied tenure because he's completely demented while another has grown massive arms from (presumed) steroid use. Half the faculty hates the other half because of an ideological dispute that occurred 10 years earlier and the other half hates the first half because they're big giant douchebags. Meanwhile, the Christmas potluck is approaching and who's going to show up?
The history department is a complete nuthouse staffed by insecure intellectual gigolos who would sell their souls just to be able to say to their colleagues 'I have a much more impressive lexicon than you.' Of course in academia it's not about your reputation as a scholar, or the number of books and articles you have published, it's about vengeance on your peers.
Are you mentally unstable? Do you need a job where madness is not only tolerated but encouraged? Are you petty, insincere, snobby, and of an average IQ? Join the academic pool! Where mediocrity is enough ammunition to make your colleagues feel bad about themselves.
Yup, sounds like a normal university department. So what are you taking to the pot luck??
ReplyDelete(p.s. my last verifaction word was bralik. Bra li[c]k. It's not doing this to just me is it??)
I'm taking an edible bra to the potluck! It was the universe's way of telling you...
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